Here's a few quotes taken directly from the official site which always manage to crack me up:

James:

*Hope it keeps snowing cause I can't wait to throw my back out shoveling snow.
*The fact that a puppet show was the highlight of the day should say enough.
*No bleeding dogs today, I guess they can't all be winners.
*We were up and ready to go by 12:00. I was just finishing my breakfast when Rich ran through to the front door with Arnold's dog, who had been sleeping in the back room. He opened the front closet and pulled out the leash hanging on the bar, then grabbed the dog's collar to attach the leash and take it out to relieve itself. He had just fastened it when he noticed the blood on his hands, jacket and shirt. "Oh my God, who's blood is this?" In the time it took for him to say this, the dog had painted the walls red
with its blood soaked tail, but not before pissing all over the floor. She had apparently gnawed on her own tail through the night, the result of her need to eat anything and everything; from cigarette butts to seat belts. Needless to say, the rest of the day seemed uneventful.
*When I was a child (so my Mum tells me) I was terrified of the Scotty tissues character. He was a little cotton ball with eyes. I would cry at the sight of him, now I think he's cute.
*Talking dolls are incredibly scary and I think the talking Woody story would have made me piss myself with fear. I had a Star Wars snowspeeder toy that spontaneously made blaster noises well into the night, it scared the crap out of me and by the time I figured out what it was I fell back asleep again. I ended up taking the batteries out but it took me a while to figure that one out, I think I was just tired.
*We're late for almost everything.
*He said penetrates!
*I am praised everywhere I go. People drop to their knees and chant my name. I kiss babies and get my feet washed by beautiful women and then I wake up.
*I can play trumpet very poorly.
*I worked at restuarants washing dishes and I'd use to wear these great big fireproof gloves that my dad would get from work so that my hands wouldn't split open from all of the water. We'd be playing so much and rehearsing and writing so much that my hands would always peal. I'd be in there with this firepproof gloves on washing dishes -- basically just working enough to be able to have a social life on the weekends and then go to school.
*I remember when we were recording Letters From Chutney, actually, taking the bus from school to the studio. That's fucking wicked. [laughter] You finish math and then go record for a major label.
*I'm a totally small and skinny guy who had no business buying an XL shirt. For some reason, a concert XL means tent size.
*Hockey Fan? No, I'm a disgrace to Canada.

Rich:

*Hey guys it is Rich here , i went on under james as i am having problems with my password ..... basically i have no idea what i am doing and had james log on for me .
*A sure sign of illness is when Coke cases , granola bars and any kind chocolate are replaced with Cranberry juice , oranges and chicken noodle soup .. not your typical rock and roll studio story huh!!!!!
*My sister justine convinced me to join her in the art jazz dancing. What the hell is jazz dancing? I can't really recall now, but I do recall spending weekends in purple tight tights with a room full of young girls, dancing to songs with names like "the lollipop".
*That's what happens when your parents buy you "hairwalks".
*I dabbled with a guitar for about a day. Christmas day, in fact.

Sean:

*It was 1989. I was in high school, working part time so I had more disposable income than I've had before or since.
*I was on my way to a bass guitar lesson and had put my new Fender Squire P-Bass in the front seat, thinking I looked ridiculous strapping it in with the seat belt.
*Ironically, I slow down at the tracks to lessen the jolt riding over them, thinking about my bass in the front seat and not wanting the CD player to skip (it was 1989 remember).
*I'm alright, even though the driver's seat is now twisted and I'm picking little fragmented cubes of auto glass out of my arms. I look in the crumpled back seat and thank God no one was sitting there, although I notice the slide-out deck was launched into the rear upon impact. Anyone back there would have had 'Alpine' branded into their forehead.
*I must have been dazed, because we ended up driving right past my house with a perfectly good phone to a gas station about five minutes further away.
*Ahhh. memories!

Rick:

*Now any other day I would have normally chosen a 7-layer burrito over an improv exercise. But for some reason I had a change of heart, I'm not sure what it was, but it probably had something to do with my drama teacher seeing me trying to leave the school.
*We don't look at it like we found a drummer; we look at it like Rich found a band.

Scott:

*Nobody has any clean laundry left. actually, i have one white t-shirt given to me by a soldier at an airforce base. it has a giant eagle with a banner that states the wearer is "proud to be an american." the guy made me promise that i'd wear it on stage some day. some day when i don't want my own country to let me back in, i guess.
*Red bull and vodka. a charmingly belligerent combination. just keep me away from it, from now on. we'll all be a lot better off.
*Everyone can't wait to tell you how cold it's getting. bring it on.
*Why, in every stadium dressing room, does at least one shower have a little bench? you can fold it up and down, if it's a classy enough arena. i tried it, just to see what i'd been missing all these years, and it just felt unnatural.
*Great crowd. hope you liked it, biloxi. we loved it. on stage, i called you Mississippi. sorry to generalize, but i'm positive that you're not all from biloxi anyway.
*Good times in louisiana ... who would have guessed?.
*I've never experienced how ridiculous any christmas event is without snow. i asked two of the locals what christmas was to them, considering the lack of snow. they told me, without hesitation, "not much." exactly. you people haven't earned your christmas. that's why you don't appreciate it. and spreading lights all over your lawn (admittedly, a cool idea) is really just an insult to real snow. you know what the weather was like yesterday? these people have their christmas parade on what pretty much feels like a hot spring day ... ridiculous.
*You can't just go to the buffet whenever you feel like it, you must be so weak and bereft of any food energy that you're bound to get your money's worth once you actually get to the restaurant.
*Rich just wanted to try his luck on the "wheel of fortune" slots before we left. about one minute later, rich had lost 60 bucks.
*Rich looked pale, and i was laughing on the outside, trying to play it cool.
*I should mention that catering had neon bowls around the salads and condiments, which i felt was a pretty sharp touch. "dinner in the not-too distant future," i think, was the motif they were going for. glad to know we're still gonna have salad [in the future]. good projection. i hope they're right.
*And whoever sold the individually wrapped starburst to the guy in front of me should lose his gig. this guy tried to be quiet about unwrapping his candy, but that just made him sound noisier. at least the bag lasted him the entire movie, so that's a plus. when his bag was finally finished, he even checked it by holding it up a bit and sliding both hands slowly up both sides, just in case he'd missed one. years of planning and millions of dollars worth of art get f---ed over because of a 2 dollar bag of candy. sweet deal.
*That's great. Fuck, that's great.